Clutter

It's easy to throw trash away. I wish I could do the same with my thoughts. i wish I could just de-clutter my mind of all the negativity, worry and sorrow. I use meditation as a way to escape and search for peace of mind but even during meditation my thoughts are constantly yelling at me and reminding me of everything that I am and everything that I am not. I walk around campus like I have everything together and work overtime to make it look like I do but inside I'm falling apart. I can feel my insides literal ripping apart and for reasons unknown to me. I've let sadness build up inside of me for too long I don't even know what it is that makes me upset anymore. Lately I find myself crying inappropriately over the most peculiar things. I wish I could de-clutter my mind and find that solitude.